Behavioural Patterns

Behaviour is usually determined by a combination of conscious and subconscious thought patterns.  The question is, are your patterns of behaviour working for you?  It is said that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting a different result. 

It can sometimes feel like you are beating your head against a brick wall, feeling the pain and knowing that it will hurt and it won't get you what you want but you can't help but keep on doing it.  In reflection it seems silly and gets frustrating but before you realise it you do it again. You ask yourself why you did it again and get annoyed with yourself for being so stupid and then spiral into a negative state focusing on a lifetime of failure blaming the world thinking you were dealt a horrible life. 

What drives a person to do this?  Often it is because the person is not aware that there is another way or has not deleved into the subconsious to establish the underlying patterns of behaviour. Or you can see the pattern but have not made a decision or taken action toward paving a new path and pattern of behaviour.  You are the architect of your life and have the ability to create outcomes that work for you and are in the direction of what you truly want in life.

Nobody on the planet is immune to these patterns, the difference is what you do when faced with the inevitable challenge of an undesireable outcome.  Do you throw in the towel and think that it's your destiny to have a frustrating life of failure or do you take on the challenge, seek help and do what it takes to turn things around?  It is not always an easy task to realise that if you do what you've always done, then you will get what you have always gotten and to shift your focus toward success and having faith in your ability to create what you want.

Also consider that a negative pattern of behaviour has a payoff and can often be serving a purpose that may actually at some level be positive.  Sabotage or failure can be very frustrating but at the end of the day, you may be protecting yourself from something, or in your gut/heart know that something isn't right for you or the timing is not right.  Every relationship or connection is possible to redeem and every situation can be turned around.  Making things right or wrong or good or bad can be debilitating but being grateful for the experience and lessons you learn from old patterns helps you to find the gift in every experience.

What is Love?

Often love is a romantasised concept that can be perceived as an all positive fairy tale.  My approach to love is somewhat similar to that of Dr John De Martini or Marienne Williamson where love includes all things, experiences and events both positive and negative.  It is not exclusive to a romantic relationship but is inclusive of all people and experiences.  Please hold in mind that no approach to anything is true, right or real unless you choose to take it on as your truth or belief.  This is simply what I perceive as an empowering approach to life that can help you to live with more inspiration and balance.

Have you ever known a person who has never felt sad, depressed, angry or frustrated who is always positive, happy and inspired? Truthfully, is it even humanly possible to be positive all the time?  Often depression can be caused by a shattered idea of how you thought things would or should be.   What if you saw each event in life as the exact thing you needed to experience to be able to truly love yourself and experience the true expression of your beautiful soul?  What if you had the ability to see the light in the darkness or a blessing in a tragedy? As difficult as it can be to do this, you are the one who has to live with your thoughts, feelings and actions.  You have one life and from the depths of despair can come the greatest gifts if you choose to see it that way.

Your focus determines your outcome and focusing on the positive while embracing the negative as an aspect of love can free you to be able to move forward in life, accept others just the way they are and channel your energy toward creating the life of your dreams.  Be sure to choose your inner circle of people wisely to include inspired people who accept you during all phases of your life and go forth and love and accept them and yourself just the way you are too!!

Speak Your Truth

So often in life there are many things that go unsaid.  What if you lived like there was no tomorrow and spoke up about what is true for you in love and life?  It can seem like a scary concept because of social conditioning and judgement of what is considered right or wrong in terms of the way we should be, how we should act and what we should say.  Who is to say what you are thinking or feeling is good or bad?  If it is real for you then that is the only thing that matters.

Some people may be able to handle your honesty and others may not and that is just perfect.  Witholding your true self expression can cause you to feel inadequate, awkward or resentful.  At the end of the day, every single human being on the planet has different values, assessing situations in many varying ways and making judgements through their own eyes based on past conditioning and experiences.  It is important to know that there are people out there who understand you, accept you the way you are and value your willingness to express your innner self and beauty.

Regret can be debilitating and taking a risk can be frightening but nothing ventured, nothing gained.  What is it that you want to say to your family, friends, partner or the world?  Is there a project you want to start that delivers a message or makes a difference?  Is there a special someone you want to know how you feel about them?  Do you have unsaid family issues that you avoid talking about that you know are holding you back in life?  Whatever it is for you, say it with power, confidence and the knowing that loving yourself comes first to allow those around you to love you too!!

Boundaries

Living a life of unconditional love and never giving up on other people can be a challenge.  When do you draw the line in the sand in the way people treat you and what is acceptable to you when you are committed to loving no matter what and never giving up on anyone.  So often we can lose ourselves in this and forget that we need boundaries and know when to let go.  It is important to remember that everyone is teaching us something about ourselves and to allow the healing to occur naturally and gracefully.

Boundaries are important in our every day interaction with others as it let's them know how to treat you and is essentail to helping to grow your self worth.  If you do not have clear boundaries you will lose yourself and leave youself open to being walked all over and hurt.  It is important not to blame others when your boundaries are crossed but to get to know where you may have not communicated clearly in that situation that the other person thought it was ok to cross over into your emotional space. 

Sometimes you just have to let go of people who are not good for you or who don't understand your boundaries.  You deserve to have people in your life who accept you as you are and respect your boundaries as they want what is best for you and for you to have your needs met.  You deserve the best in life and being clear on your needs and boundaries will set you free to attract into your life people who care about your wellbeing and resepct your needs. 

Everyone comes across your path for a reason and it is important to see what that reason is.  Live and learn and move forward powerfully in life.  You are worthy and deserve everything you dream of!

Letting go

When you know what you want in life, it is so important to let go of the attachment to it and allow it to come to you naturally and gracefully.  You do not need to chase after what you want or hunt it down.  All you need to do is know what you want, what you love and where you are going and take one step at a time toward your outcomes. 

So often in life we can chase dreams and aspirations and forget about the journey and the gifts that are available in each moment.  When you push for things to happen, you push them away.  When you allow things to unfold, you gracefully walk in the direction of your heart's desires and things will be attracted to you. 

The art of allowing is about being authentically you and letting go of the past that may be holding you back.  It is focusing on what you want while multi-tasking to get to the place you are meant to be.  When you are inspired and loving what you are doing, you will most likely not be attached to it and things will unfold toward your ultimate dreams.

So go forth and be clear on what you want, then let go of your attachment to it and allow what is destined to be attracted to you come to you with grace.  If you find yourself attached, know that it is perfect and everything happens for a reason.  Consider if it is working for you then make the adjustments in your life to suit your authentic self and ultimate path.

Love to focus...

In life we can scatter our thoughts, therefore never attracting the things we really want because we are not focused on what we want. Feminine by nature is not focused but it is possible to balance the feminine with the masculine focus and create the results you want in your life.  In the 21st century, it is impossible to survive if you do not have some form of focus and goals while being committed to an outcome. 

Do you know what you want in life?  So often we do not know what we want therefore we do not have anything to focus on and this shows up as a lack of results.  Who is the authentic you?  What do you truly want?  If you were to let go of fear and sabotage, what would you truly create in your life?

If you find yourself being afraid to set goals because you may have fallen short before, it is time to let go of that and begin to know what you want and allow it to be attracted to you.  When you cut off from the things that were distracting you from your true desires, that is when you will have the time, space and energy to allow into your life what you are wanting the most.

So be clear on your heart's desires, let go of the barriers and go out and create what you truly deserve!

Loving Your Work

In life we spend a lot of our time at our work place.  I believe it is very imporant to choose a career path that you are happy with and you enjoy waking up each morning embarking on.  So often people get stuck in a work environment that they don't like because of fear.  They are afraid to take on something new or of what will happen if they fail.  What if there was no such thing as failure?   What would you be doing with your life? 

Growing up we are conditioned to see a career in a certain way.  It may be that you think you need to be the CEO to be successful or you may be happy doing something else that takes a different sort of commitment to be good at.  In that conditioning process, often people will take on a career path that their parents wanted them to do or something they thought would give them prestige or credit.  And then that person lands up unfulfilled and wondering what happened with their life.  Have you ever asked yourself why you are doing what you do?  Have you ever thought about what you truly want to be doing with your life and where you want to be in 10 years time?

Wherever you are is perfect.  Everything happens for a reason and no matter what you have been doing you have gained skills and experience to move forward with what you want to do.  You may be working in your dream career and be perfectly happy with that or you may want to make some changes.  Just think about what is important to you and where you would like to be spending your time and energy for the rest of your working life.  Loving what you do is inspiring to others as you are inspired.  It is rewarding and allows you to express yourself truly in all that you choose to do.  So go forth with power and choose a career path that you love and can see yourself being an inspiration in.