Relationships...
In life it seems that some people are great at some things
and not so great at others. Relationships
are something that I don’t quite feel qualified to write or talk about as it
has been one area of my life that has been a challenge. Give me a half marathon, career challenge or
friendship and I most often feel comfortable, able to manage and make something
great of it. When it comes to intimate
feelings and relationships, I tend to freak out, get intense, focus on failure
and mess it all up reliving patterns of the past. I live in hope that one day there will be
someone who can handle it or be able to accept my uniqueness. Always learning from each experience but asking
myself when I will overcome the pattern and reach a balance. I (as we all are) am a work in progress and all is not lost... What I do feel comfortable writing about is
the journey of self love regardless of external circumstances. The ability not
need someone else or material things to feel content or fulfilled but holding
the intention that there is someone out there who is a match and accepts me
just the way I am. I am not talking about a warm and fuzzy all positive
life. I am talking about a balance of the
good times, tough times and the journey of remembering the philosophy that
everything happens for a reason and where we are is right where we are meant to
be, otherwise known as divine perfection.
Social pressure to live the stereotypical life (which is not
right or wrong) of marriage, kids and conformity is not the fault of society. A lot of people truly enjoy and love that
lifestyle. So when did it become what is
considered the “right” way to live life? The fact is that it is not always but often
self inflicted pressure and judgement that can cause feelings of inadequacy and
thoughts that there is something wrong with you if you aren’t doing what most
of your friends are doing. Let’s face it;
the grass can always seem greener on the other side! In the 21st century there are no
rules. We live in an age of opportunity
and choice therefore allowing people to create the life they want rather than
one of expectation of others. So what do
you truly want your life and relationships to look like? Not based on someone else’s expectations, but
based on your own true values, beliefs and goals in life. For those who have not had strong role models
for the type of relationship desired, or have not been exposed to successful
relationships it can be a struggle to even paint a picture of a powerful relationship. They say that you must first go there in the
mind before you go there in the body.
“If you don’t know
where you are going, you will fall into the plans of someone else” Dr John
De Martini
As challenging as it seems and trust me this is easier said
than done, accepting your current circumstances and being fulfilled with life
regardless of your situation is so important.
You only live once so why not make the most of what you have in any
given moment. I am not saying be
positive all the time as that is not realistic and overcoming patterns of the
past can feel overwhelmingly negative at times. When keeping a positive outlook holding in mind the ultimate outcome, the obstacles can seem smaller
and most definitely worthwhile. It is
said that acknowledging and facing your fears is one of the most effective ways
of overcoming them. Susan Jeffers said
it well in her book of the same title “feel the fear and do it anyway”. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
What if you could see that there is nothing missing in your
life? You have all the love you need at
any given moment and everything will work out in the end even if it seems it
might not. Can you always view the world
through the eyes of the concept of divine perfection and that everything happens
for a reason? Probably not and there most certainly will be times when you feel a big gap in your life... but why not
choose to see the light as much as you can for your own benefit and for the
benefit of those around you.
So what can you do for you today to get clear on what you
want, let go of attachment to it and have more fun and inspiration in your
life? What are the things that resemble
loving yourself to you? Go out and do
those things and embrace each opportunity that comes your way. Choose your dates and partner wisely knowing
that you are magnificent, beautiful and perfect the way you are and powerful on
your own and with someone else. Seek help to overcome patterns of the past and paint a realistic and powerful picture for your future. Surround
yourself with people who love and accept you the way you are regardless of
your situation. Give your life meaning
and every day do something that makes a difference and brings light and
inspiration to the lives of others. With
a powerful reason to live, you will really LIVE!!!
Enjoy the journey, including the pot holes in the road... they are all part of the big picture!!
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